[she's so brave, it should make him feel like shit. sometimes, it does. mostly, he can't believe someone like this -- someone like her -- actually exists]
[it means different things for them, to face what's haunting them head on. it doesn't make it less terrifying (Badou wants guts, Nill wants love -- both such frightening prospects)]
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yeah
i do
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but im playing the normal girl
isnt that a lie?
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who shitty things happened 2
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i dont know i feel like
they give me a lot
and i give them nothing
i want to trust them
with it
thats the biggest thing i can give them
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aint that fucked up
they know what its like
from both of us
she asked me if i got sold
she could ask u
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i dont want to answer because im asked
i want to give it to her
i want them to know
i appreciate them enough
to do that
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u think ur telling just them but
soon every1 knows n thinks other shit about u
u got no more handle on it
i dont trust her
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she means well but
she hurts a lot too
because she takes in too much
so she needs shoulders to lean on sometimes
i dont think shed share it
where it could hurt me though
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hurts enough by itself
its not her life
n u aint owe her nothing
i told the wrong guy
he never told any1
but i regret it a lot
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decide to tell?
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it was a mistake
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but they wont get it
theyll ask u about it after
when u dont wanna talk about it
theyll act like ur just
another fucked up kid
they think im fucked up
it makes carol n me
fight all the time
it makes sakamoto drink
its not my fault or theirs
but it happens
itll happen w/ u
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i know how to manage it but
im still ruined
anyway they wont know any better
unless i let them know me
and they cant know me
if i dont tell them where i started
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they aint made the effort to care about
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its that they know
how things are
and sometimes its best
not to ask
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not to tell sometimes
i dont know
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i dont know how long to run away from it
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i know ur brave n shit
n care about living n ppl
but its not gonna go away
[he thinks about Takasugi.]
if u tell some1
it catches up
do u want that ?
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so i dont want to be running
all my life
no
[ but i'm better at knowing safe places than you are ]
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is there
if u dont wanna keep running
or let it catch up
u cant have both
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head on
on my own terms
i dont want it to catch me
when im not ready
but meeting it
that might not be so bad
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[it means different things for them, to face what's haunting them head on. it doesn't make it less terrifying (Badou wants guts, Nill wants love -- both such frightening prospects)]
do u think ur ready
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